Hurting

I'm hurting this morning. But I'm not worrried about myself. Somehow I'm better at handling that.

I'm worried about a friends and relatives. I woke up to a worried phone call from my mom this morning, and went to bed after, talking, crying, and praying with friends. I'm having trouble reacting to everything.

I have a lot of reactions that I know aren't good, such as:
1. Officially and purposely being mean to males from now on. Relationships are the pits. Worst case involves swearing and tears; best case involves change, major change. It's not their fault, but it would be easier if guys just didn't exist.

2. Staying hurt all day. Carrying it in my heart. Trying to fix it all myself.
I'm not God, and this doesn't work. Been there. Done that.

I know He's there. I trust Him. But I need to trust Him more.